I have often wondered what I would say to you. The person who assaulted me.
The truth is, I am not ready to forgive you. Not now.
The wounds you left are still too raw. Most days, I don’t think about you. I am too busy dealing with everything you left behind: the pain in my body, the fear in my mind, the endless appointments, the therapy sessions, and the anxiety that creeps into my daily life.
You shattered my sense of safety.
You changed the way I move through the world.
Still, I find myself writing this letter.
Maybe it’s a way to release some of what I carry.
Maybe it’s my attempt to take back the power you tried to steal.
I need to say this out loud.
So here it is:
To the One Who Hurt Me
What you did to me will never be okay.
I am not ready to forgive you. Not now.
You crossed a line that cannot be crossed.
You turned me from a nurse who loved to help into a survivor of violence.
What you did was not okay.
It was not excusable.
It was not “just part of the job.”
You did not just hurt my body. You hurt my spirit.
You left behind invisible wounds that ache in silence.
You made me question everything: my safety, my worth, and my career.
And the worst part?
I know I’m not the first.
I know I won’t be the last.
This happens every day, across the country, and too often, it’s ignored.
But I refuse to be silent.
You may never face legal consequences.
You may never feel remorse.
But I am holding you accountable here, in these words.
You did not get the best of me.
You do not get to define my story.
I am reclaiming my voice and my narrative.
And I am speaking out.
Because silence is how this keeps happening.
And I am done being silent.
I do not need your apology.
I do not want your excuses.
I am not writing this for you.
I am writing it for me – and for every nurse who has endured abuse and never received justice.
I will never forget.
I will never excuse it.
And I will not let this be buried in silence.
– A Nurse Who Refuses to Disappear
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